Pride comes before a fall

I recently wrote an Alternative Guide to Preparing for Motherhood. But perhaps that was a misnomer, because unless you are a parent, you’re unlikely to ‘get’ that post.

When your kids seem to be having meltdowns over every tiny little thing (My biscuit broke in half! That lady in the lift looked at me! There’s an extra 2mm of water in my cup!), there are few things more annoying than a parent-to-be who smugly tells you how they are so ready for the changes parenthood will bring, how unbelievably useful the antenatal classes they’ve attended have been, how they are already living a babycentric life.

Third, and Fourth, Culture Kids

There’s a lot been written recently about third culture kids – kids who grow up in a culture which is different from that of their parents.

I was third culture kid…and my parents didn’t share a culture either. Let’s call that a fourth culture kid, to differentiate from kids whose parents come from the same culture, but live elsewhere.

It think this is an important distinction to make.

Modern Miracles

BabyBoy and BabyGirl have been ill. With some sort of bug. Nothing too serious, just miserable.

BabyBoy got it first. Not knowing what we were dealing with we kept an eye on him for a few days. On day 4 we took him to the doctor. The doctor prescribed antibiotics.

The Alternative Guide to Preparing for Motherhood

Parenting guides (not that I read many before I gave birth) will talk about bonding, how to change a diaper, breastfeeding, and even getting your love life back on track. However, they probably won’t mention the following things that you need to do before becoming a mother:

1. Practice feeling like a failure. At some point, you are going to feel like you’re failing as a mum. Chances are, you’re probably not, but it’ll feel like it. Do you know what first made me feel like a failure? Listening to my (then) pediatrician. We are no longer on speaking terms.

The Grazed Knee Apocalypse

Do you remember a time when you tripped over and grazed your knee in the playground? How the wound was cleaned up and perhaps a band aid put on it? And did it have a profound traumatizing effect on your life?

You’d think most people’s answers would be ‘yes, yes, no’.

Charity is a tricky business

In the wake of Typhoon Haiyan (Yolanda) I have stuffed cash in donation boxes, contributed to a church donation drive, participated in a bake sale and bought tickets to a fundraising dinner.

And all this has brought up two issues:

1) Why do we so often need an incentive (in this case, cakes and dinner, but also things like people absailing and doing marathons etc) to contribute to a cause?

and

2) Can making children participate in charitable sponsorship activities (e.g. sponsored walks) be harmful?

Ignoring the world

Today was one of those days. One of those days when I’m glad that I have perfected the art of pretending the rest of the world isn’t there and is not staring and judging my parenting.

Thank goodness I learned this trick early.

Sleeping Beauty

I like to think I have a strong marriage. I love my husband.

But if he falls asleep at random times during the day – in the car while I’m driving, while he’s supposed to be playing with the kids – one more time I may have to punch something.

‘We’re not having a party’

So BabyBoy and BabyGirl are turning 2. And with this milestone came the dreaded children’s birthday party.

Except, this wasn’t supposed to be a party. Let me go back and explain.

The things we do to avoid gender stereotypes

BabyBoy and BabyGirl were recently given sets of magnets as presents. All animals, so not gender-specific, which I appreciated. But with nowhere for them to adhere to, I needed to go in search of a magnetic board.

(It was at this point that I should have cut my losses and conveniently ‘lost’ these toys in the pile for regifting. Oops.)