Ah, Christmas. That wonderful time of year when families come together and all is joyful….until the inevitable foot-in-mouth situation.
I love that there are now children around again at Christmas. But three years ago I was teetering on the edge of post-partum depression, fueled by an epic family disagreement (one day to be the subject of a post). And in those first newborn weeks I made the stupid decision to get professional photographs taken of the newborns. Continue reading
My last post in the Three Great Highchairs series is mainly for those with multiples, and it is not so much for feeding as it is for bottle-feeding and specifically, tandem bottle-feeding.
Even if you exclusively breastfeed your multiples, there will be times when it will be in everyone’s interest for someone other than mum to do a feed. And if your babies are on the same schedule, chances are that either they’ll both be demanding milk at the same time, and/or you will have discovered how much time you can save by tandem feeding. This is where this particular bit of kit can help.
(A future post will deal with tandem breastfeeding.)
Even before BabyBoy and BabyGirl were born, I was teetering on the edge of depression. The thought of having twins terrified me, because that wasn’t in the plan. When they arrived, healthy and perfect, I tumbled headlong down the rabbit hole of postnatal depression into denial, doubt, panic, resentment at not being ‘normal’ and wondering whether escape was an option.
Maternal instinct is a tricky concept. Why? Because it makes it all too easy to fall into the trap of ‘I should know this!’ And once you fall into that trap, it becomes harder and harder to ask for advice, get help or seek information.
‘You’re failing as a mother,’ goes the little voice in the back of your mind as you realize that giving birth had not endowed you will a instant mental baby manual. Continue reading
Unwanted advice is part and parcel of having a baby. From your mother-in-law, sister, lady at the post office, taxi driver, person you’re trying to desperately maneuver your stroller around on the sidewalk….
People are going to give you advice, often at times when you don’t want to hear it, and often you will think that it is complete and utter nonsense. You will get fed up. You will get angry. You will want to tell them to keep their nose out of your life.
A long time ago (it seems) I was suffering from post-natal depression and overwhelmed by becoming a mum of twins.
And the most terrifying thing to me was the endlessness and relentlessness of parenting – that unlike a job, course, friendship….this wasn’t something that I could just quit.
Once upon a time there were two bears: Daddy Bear and Mama Bear. They lived in little house that was not near any woods.
Mama Bear was pregnant with BabyBear 1 and BabyBear 2. The time came for Mama Bear to go to the hospital to give birth. Daddy Bear accompanied Mama Bear and stayed at the hospital with her.
While Mama Bear was in hospital Goldilocks did not appear, but Mother-in-Law Bear and Father-in-Law Bear came to the little house.
There was no porridge to eat, but there were beds to sleep in.
Being modern-day bears, Daddy Bear and Mama Bear shared one bed. It was a little bit firm and a little bit soft. In fact, as the BabyBears were to sleep in their own cots, it was just right.
(There was also a guest bed but Grandma Bear was already installed in it.)
So, just as Goldilocks had once upon a time sampled the Bears’ porridge and beds without so much as a thought, so this time did Mother-in-Law Bear decree that she would sleep in Daddy and Mama Bears’ bed. After all, it wasn’t bring used at that moment and was just right.
(Father-in-Law Bear was relegated to the sofa.)
And just like Goldilocks, Mother-in-Law Bear did not ask permission, or think that poor Mama Bear might want her bed nice and clean when she returned to the little house with the newborn BabyBears.
‘Someone’s been sleeping in my bed’ did not adequately express Mama Bear’s feelings upon finding that her bed had been used, without permission, by someone else, at a particularly vulnerable time.
The End
airplane (Photo credit: shyb)
I admit, before I had children I was one of those people. The ones who spotted a baby in the airport and immediately starting thinking ‘please don’t be on my flight, please don’t be on my flight’.
Oh how times have changed. Now when Multidaddy and I walk into an airport we’re accompanied by not one but two babies. Now we’re the ones getting the sidelong glances.
But we still have to go places, so here are some tips to make air travel with babies as painless as possible… Continue reading
Winter has arrived and with it a new stack of clothes. The winter additions to my ‘new mummy wardrobe’.
Pre-babies, I never left the house without heels. I had a collection of handbags of different sizes, colours and materials. Most of my clothes were work-attire (suits) or going out outfits. Jewelry was an elaborate affair, featuring long necklaces and earrings.
As a mummy, all that has changed. My pre-baby wardrobe is now reserved for those occasional baby-free evenings. My clothes now have to withstand being pulled and stretched, long hours playing on the floor, and continuous trips to playgroups. Dry-cleaning is out – clothes need to be able to be thrown into the washing machine if covered in milk or worse. Shoes have to be comfortable and safe enough to carry and run around after two mobile toddlers. Beautiful handbags have been replaced by the ever-present diaper bag. Jewelry has been put aside as it only represents a new shiny toy to be tugged on by little hands.
After the first few weeks of motherhood (during which I spent a lot of time in / near home), it became quite clear that most of my beautiful clothes were completely unsuited to life with babies. I also had no time to think about putting outfits together or accessorizing. As spring approached I realized that what I needed was effectively a ‘mummy uniform’ – a set of clothes that were both baby-proof and, crucially, all matched; so that if a baby spat up on a top I would simply need to change it for another one in my wardrobe that I knew would go with the bottoms I was already wearing.
So here are my tips for creating a ‘new mummy’ wardrobe that is both functional and ensures that you look good, no matter how many times you have to change in a morning:
1) Enlist the help of a babysitter and go shopping alone. It is much easier to think without two babies competing for your attention.
2) Find an whole outfit (top, bottoms and extra layer for warmth) that works and fits you well. For my spring / summer wardrobe, this was jeggings, t-shirt and cardigan. Ensure all items are machine-washable. Trousers or long skirts are essential if you don’t want to run the risk of a wardrobe malfunction while playing with your children on the floor.
3) Buy multiples of those same tops, bottoms and layers. If you buy different colours, make sure they all match on all different combinations (e.g. if you have bought trousers in dark blue and black, your tops could be bright blue, orange, and green). The number of each item you buy depends on how often you do laundry.
I’ve had many different nightdresses throughout my pregnancy and breastfeeding days. But the ones with the most longevity have to be Mothercare’s Blooming Marvellous Maternity Nightshirts.
These are not the most flattering, but they’re 100% cotton so they’re cool and easy to wash. They have front poppers to allow you to feed (no fiddly clips to try and maneuver with one hand while holding on to a newborn). They are airy so they won’t rub against a healing c-section scar. And they cover you up (unlike strappy ones) , so you can get out of bed and lounge around the house knowing that should the doorbell ring unexpectedly or your father-in-law happen to traipse past you don’t have to struggle into your dressing gown with a wriggly baby screaming the place down.
Continue reading
afterninemonths 