When support becomes insupportable

So recently I reached out to a friend for support. BabyBoy and BabyGirl had been all over the place for days, and I needed some reassurance that this was normal toddler behavior (which I know it is, but it’s nice to hear it from someone else, and I was hoping for some other ideas on how to cope).

When you’ve had to abandon an outing because your kids are having a meltdown, the absolute last thing you need is a message saying, ‘Sorry, my kid is totally amazing and never freaks out ever’. (Ok I’m paraphrasing, but only a bit).

Pride comes before a fall

I recently wrote an Alternative Guide to Preparing for Motherhood. But perhaps that was a misnomer, because unless you are a parent, you’re unlikely to ‘get’ that post.

When your kids seem to be having meltdowns over every tiny little thing (My biscuit broke in half! That lady in the lift looked at me! There’s an extra 2mm of water in my cup!), there are few things more annoying than a parent-to-be who smugly tells you how they are so ready for the changes parenthood will bring, how unbelievably useful the antenatal classes they’ve attended have been, how they are already living a babycentric life.

The Alternative Guide to Preparing for Motherhood

Parenting guides (not that I read many before I gave birth) will talk about bonding, how to change a diaper, breastfeeding, and even getting your love life back on track. However, they probably won’t mention the following things that you need to do before becoming a mother:

1. Practice feeling like a failure. At some point, you are going to feel like you’re failing as a mum. Chances are, you’re probably not, but it’ll feel like it. Do you know what first made me feel like a failure? Listening to my (then) pediatrician. We are no longer on speaking terms.

Ignoring the world

Today was one of those days. One of those days when I’m glad that I have perfected the art of pretending the rest of the world isn’t there and is not staring and judging my parenting.

Thank goodness I learned this trick early.

Sleeping Beauty

I like to think I have a strong marriage. I love my husband.

But if he falls asleep at random times during the day – in the car while I’m driving, while he’s supposed to be playing with the kids – one more time I may have to punch something.

‘We’re not having a party’

So BabyBoy and BabyGirl are turning 2. And with this milestone came the dreaded children’s birthday party.

Except, this wasn’t supposed to be a party. Let me go back and explain.

To Parents of Small Children: Let Me Be the One Who Says It Out Loud

I used to think that motherhood = martyrdom. And that I would be failing as a mother if I was not a martyr.

Now, as BabyBoy and BabyGirl near the 2 year old mark, I am getting better at reminding myself that it’s ok for me to take a break. And it’s brutally honest views from other parents, like the extract below (which also makes a great point about information saturation), which helps to keep me on the straight and narrow path to sanity.

Blurred Lines?

Here’s the thing about parenthood – things that in your pre-baby life didn’t really bother you suddenly assume far greater importance once you have another human being (or two) to bring up.

I’ve had a blogging break over the summer, but the whole Robin Thicke / Miley Cyrus controversy has spurred me back into action, because I’m now imaging what I’d say to my children should they stand by and ask “What’s this all about, Mummy?”

The Grandparent Files: Play in 20 Years

Another pearl of wisdom came forth from my mother-in-law recently (can you guess she’s been visiting?)

So, here’s the scenario. She came to visit. She played with BabyBoy and BabyGirl. She noticed that my parenting involves teaching my children (shocker). She’s had a son.

Quote of the Week 3

Another quote I came across that I had to share:

“There are two things we should give our children: one is roots and the other is wings.”